Date: 2021-10-19 05:03 am (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (hiya cupcake)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
Oh! Yeah! Did I forget to mention I bought myself a little perk? I can do this once a week. Like I said, it's my me-time.

[Jack grins. Oh it feels good to move his face. Sure, being a bot's got some definite advantages. But so does being a sack of meat.]

Just that one night a week I get to come home, kick off the old shoes, and then eat, drink, smoke, or snort whatever the frig I want! There's just some things the synthetic life can't quite emulate. I got a pizza lying around here somewhere, if you can still eat food-food.

[He waves a hand vaguely, not entirely sure where the leftovers have been left.]

Date: 2021-10-20 02:53 am (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (moron says what)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
Are you serious?

[Jack lifts one heavy eyebrow, tilting his head to give Rhys a skeptical look.]

Look at me. I'm in my pajamas. Do I look like a guy who's the least bit inclined to make you friggin dinner right now? Cuz I'm not. This is why ya gotta call ahead. Not to mention that you showing up just cuz you need something? Not cool, Rhys.

[He retrieves his smoldering joint from the ashtray on his side table, inhaling deeply to emphasize his point. He's relaxing. He's off the clock. He's not sending one of his guards to go murder Rhys a snack, especially when he's the one who'd have to prepare it.]

Date: 2021-10-20 03:19 am (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (can you talk?)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
One of my guys killed a dude. I turned the dude into a smoothie for you. You think the dudes that guard my door know how to make people smoothies? They're just praying every night they don't end up one themselves!

[Jack throws up his hands, shaking his head. He does not need this annoyance. He really doesn't.]

Oh, yeah, that makes a guy really inclined to help, knowing he's a last resort. You're really bad at what getting what you want, kiddo. Ugh, alright, sit down while I decide how much of a pain in the ass this is gonna be.

Date: 2021-10-20 04:29 pm (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (that sounds like something not true)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
Oh no, don't do that. Don't be one of those candy for a heart, fluff for brains assholes that needs to pretend we don't eat parts of people.

[Jack fixes Rhys with a flat look.]

You're smarter than that and you're better than that. Besides...what even is your problem? You're a friggin vampire, like the one thing that can just snack on somebody without doing major damage.

[Arguably Jack can also feed without killing, but really, with how leaves victims, it's better to just off them than leave them a vegetable.]

Date: 2021-10-21 02:59 am (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (can you talk?)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
I dunno, probably. Before there was that whole poacher mess a while back there used to be sex clubs for monsters and humans to hook up. Not many of those left, though, at least not in Bavan.

[Jack shrugs. He's never looked into it that hard, he doesn't need clubs to find people to feed on or fuck. One or the other, he's not the type to combo the two. That's just weird.]

But just...do the whole vampire thing, sheesh. Smoldering look, some smooth words, come up from behind and just go for it. I swear, vampirism is wasted on you!

Date: 2021-10-23 02:07 am (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (a literal bag of dicks)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
See? Wasted on you! And eff-why-eye, you'd be surprised how many humans are into the monster thing. You lucked out and you aren't even taking advantage of it. You end up one of the like two monster types that come with this whole tradition of thirsty lore and sex appeal attached to'em, and you're over here going 'oh, I couldn't possibly ask some horny human with a vamp fetish if I could suck on'em a little'.

[Jack takes another long drag of his joint and shakes his head. It's disappointing. If he had ended up a vampire? He'd be out there every friggin night!]

They want it, Rhys. Come on, are you gonna sit there and tell me you've never had a sexy vampire fantasy?

Date: 2021-10-23 04:22 am (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (would I lie to you)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
You don't need to have a goth phase to think vampires are hot. Pick any random ass vampire movie and chances are it's gonna star some slinky broad in a plunging neckline or chiseled dude in tight leather pants.

[It's a whole thing. Who hasn't had the vampire fantasy? It's pretty friggin standard, as far as Jack's concerned. Biting is hot, powerful immortality is hot, leather pants are hot...]

It's the whole...you know. [He waves a hand vaguely, trying to grasp at the right words.] Vampires represent loss of inhibition and indulging in vices and primal desires and yada yada yada. And something about death making people wanna fuck. I don't know, Dracula had three wives at once, obviously he was doing something right.

Date: 2021-10-23 04:21 pm (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (this is my sad face)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
Oh please, like I wouldn't chuck you into the fireplace if you tried to bite me without permission. Relax, you can make coherent sentences, you're not about to tear me apart.

[Jack fixes his mismatched eyes on Rhys, contemplating the dude. He's got a lot to learn about monsterhood. Why doesn't everybody do what Jack did, and learn as much as possible when the changes first start? It just makes life easier.

He could just leave it. Rhys will snap and the problem will take care of itself. Only he's pretty sure he'll be dealing with the fallout and that's just not on his agenda.]


But you do realize...you're gonna have to learn how to bite people. Either way I'm gonna start charging you for helping out, I normally make people pay for my meal prep services. And also go to The Chop Shop, not my personal home. So...I'm gonna offer ya another one of my many services, cuz I'm in a good mood tonight. Now I've never worked with a vamp before, because I'm a robot, but you clearly need more help with the getting to the biting stage. But you've got a choice. Either I teach you how to approach people to bite, or you suffer through this till The Chop Shop is open and come in and put in an order like everybody else. Cuz we are not establishing a pattern of you showing up like this out of the friggin blue and expecting me to feed you. You're not some freaking stray cat I'm taking care of.

Date: 2021-10-23 05:50 pm (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (what could go wrong?)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
There we go! Teach a man to fish and he stops bugging ya for fish.

[Jack grins and sits up a bit straighter in his chair.]

Okay, first things first! Lower your inhibitions a little, mellow you out, get ya feeling less self conscious.

[If Rhys' problem is that he gets hung up on how weird it is to approach somebody about this, he just needs to be in a headspace where he's less concerned about that sort of thing.]

What's your preference? I got shit to drink, smoke, snort...but I'd advise staying away from the cocaine for this, you want downers right now.

Date: 2021-10-24 05:07 am (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (that sounds like something not true)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
You're friggin kidding me. You want a mixed drink? The liquor cabinet's that big fancy thing with the onyx inlays over there, it folds out into a bar, knock yourself out.

[Jack shakes his head again. There's potential in the kid but geeze. He's a needy thing. Rhys is on his own for a fancy drink. But whatever, as long as it calms him the hell down some.

Maybe he can even have a little fun with this whole surprise plan for the evening.]


And bring me the whiskey bottle when you're done, I need a top off.

Date: 2021-10-24 05:04 pm (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (well aren't you just precious?)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
[Jack just takes the bottle and tops off his own glass, then sets it aside and stands up. Like he's gonna thank the guy for bringing a bottle from where he was to where he's going. He's the one giving up his weekly special time to help the world's most pathetic vampire.]

Alright. So you're a relatively young, good looking guy who's got the attitude of somebody who usually carries a lotta scratch in their pocket. I'm gonna guess you're no stranger to the club scene. So we're gonna tap into that tonight! Do you need me to lower the lighting and turn on music, or do you have a functional imagination?

[There's only so much effort he wants to put into all of this.]

Date: 2021-11-05 08:19 pm (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (i laugh at your pain)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
For one...you've been clubbing on Helios? For two, I have my entire music collection here. You want music, I got music!

[His own, catered to Jack's own tastes, but that just means it's really good music!

He wanders over to a bookshelf full of books he never touches and pulls out his mp player.]


What's your musical poison? I got all the classics.

Date: 2021-11-06 01:24 am (UTC)
thedifferencebetween: (hiya cupcake)
From: [personal profile] thedifferencebetween
No shit? Why didn't you say something, you know I take care of my people!

[What the hell is wrong with Rhys? Not the first time Jack has wondered this, but really. He maybe would have been less of a dick about lending him a hand if he'd known.

When left to choose the music, there's only one go-to for Jack. A few clicks of the screen and Taylor Swift is coming out of the speaker set into the bookshelf.]


Yeah, not a big dubstep fan myself. Alright. Ya got your drink, we got the music...For this little teaching demonstration I'll be playing the part of you. Or at least of a hot vampire out for a bite. The you that you're not letting yourself be!

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